This letter is for the curious. For the creator. For the explorer.

It may set off some fire alarms, and if that’s the case, I’ve done my job correctly, but hopefully we can snip some wires carefully enough to appreciate the wonder on the other side of complexity.

Let’s talk about something real sticky shall we?

Let’s talk about who the $#%& you are.

Understanding that you are an “I” is the beginning of your individuation. It happens long before language (at least language that can be understood by your fellow humans), and it persists throughout your entire life.

Who am I?

It’s a question aching every teenager, a question fueling every career transition, a question informing every entrepreneur’s business plan, brand identity, tone of voice and content pillars (particularly those committed to the healing arts).

Who am I?

It’s a question that brings people to the therapist’s office, a question that deposits seekers onto a yoga mat of a breathwork class, a question that, when contemplated intentionally, can be the key to your spiritual awakening.

So who are you?

How would you answer that question? If you’re like many, you’ll give your name, maybe your age, your gender, your marital status, whether or not you’re a parent, your ethnic and / or racial identity and maybe your professional title.

For example, my name is Jaleel Mackey, I’m a 33 years old cisgender, biracial male. I’m married with 2 kids, I have over 10 year’s experience in sales and business development working for some of the biggest names in tech, I’m the Co-Steward of BRT Studio where I teach breathwork, mindfulness, peak performance and help entrepreneurs unlock their creative potential through wisdom traditions and business acumen.

Seems like a pretty typical answer - no?

I might even include something profound like, “I’m a spiritual being having a human experience,” but what happens when I turn 34? Am I still “me?”

What happens if I have a 3rd child? (no plans for that - don’t even start. We good with the 2!) Am I still me?

What happens if my partner and I decide to separate? Am I still me?

Okay, one more - what happens if I choose to renounce everything - my family, my business, my career, my name - am I still me?

If you answered yes, then it begs the question, once again, Who am I?

You and your thoughts

Some of you identify heavily with our thoughts. Maybe your thoughts have carried you far in life, gotten you advanced degrees, earned you a substantial amount of resources, etc.

This is natural, and truthfully, your thoughts are a powerful tool that have the potential to create endless possibilities for you in this world, so to identify with them is to identify with a version of your creative potential, but which 1 of your 6,000 thoughts a day is you?

And if you’re like me, most of your thoughts are useless and contradictory, so which of thoughts thoughts are you?

And if you’ve ever long enough for a few moments to watch your thoughts, you may notice that they seem to come and go, like clouds passing in the sky, so does that mean “I” come and go like clouds passing in the sky or is the “I” consistent no matter what thoughts arise and fall?

So who are you, really?

Bhagavan Sri Ramana Maharshi, an Indian Hindu sage who lived and worked during the first half of the 20th century, offered the gift of self-enquiry as a path to both answering the question “Who am I?” and explore a spiritual awakening.

The text is a 28 question dialogue between Sri Ramana Maharshi and a seeker who eventually becomes a student, Sri M. Sivaprakasam Pillai.

It’s 8 pages long and worth the read as well as the practice to come to an embodied understanding of what I’m about to tell you, but the cold brew coffee on a Sunday morning version is this - as you address yourself with this question, “Who am I?” you’ll likely have a flood of thoughts arise, and to those thoughts, you’ll ask “And to whom are those thoughts arising?”

Mooji, a Jamaican spiritual teacher who has dedicated his work to guiding seekers through the process of self-discovery, has a practice to help expand your awareness. 

In Buddhism, the answer to “Who am I?” is rooted in the concept of no-self.

Jesus spoke to the concept of the “I am” meaning I am not an individual “self,” but I am connected to and one with all things.

You see, the thoughts you have, the body you inhabit, the external identifiers that you are likely comfortably attached to are valuable for many reasons, but they are not you. You are an expansive presence, an awareness, a consciousness. You do not begin nor do you end. You are not fleeting, you simply are. This is the "I am."

Great, Jaleel, but why does this matter?

Well, the reality is that in order to get to a place where you realize all that you’ve worked to accumulate in life is not you, you must first accumulate all that you are.

For example:

My 11 month old daughter is in a unique place where she is coming from a “no self’ where she was fully immersed in the warmth and union between her and her mother, and she is now discovering who she is as an individual. And as such, she’ll dedicate the many several years to understanding herself until one day she can get to a place where she realizes she’s an ever expanding presence.

My 7 year old son needs to first understand that he is the steward of his body which requires daily maintenance and care so that he can continue to experience and explore consciousness in this way during this lifetime.

My 33 year old self needs to appreciate and understand that I am all the things I named earlier, so that I can continue to show up in the ways that those responsibilities ask me to, and even with this awareness of my infinite self, I am acutely aware of the limitations of my humanness as they continue to offer me opportunities for further self-discovery.

It’s The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, it’s the symbol of Ouroboros - you must go on a journey of self-discovery to ultimately find yourself right back where we started, wiser, fuller and with more experiences to inspire and share with others.

So why does this really matter?

Meaning and a sense of connection to something bigger than yourself. That’s ultimately why.

We’re meaning making creatures. We’re hungry for a sense of belonging. We look around and it seems that every institution that once upheld that which mattered most to us is fractured if not crumbling.

And you’re likely looking to create a world that supports your needs and the needs of others. You’re likely looking for ways to heal the wounds of your own life and to create experiences and resources that can help others to do the same.

You’re likely looking for a way to do all of these things and more without burning out, without falling into the primordial abyss of despair and overwhelm.

Consider that infinite self, that awareness, that consciousness taught and shared by countless sages throughout the ages as a direct line to creation. An endless supply of energy, inspiration and hope.

We may not be able to commune there all day, every day (#gottawork), but creating a habit of visiting that infinite self on a regular basis is one way of getting clear on what you are creating in this world, for whom, how and why. It’ll come through when you’re ready.

All love,

J and the BRT Studio Team

Whenever you’re ready, here are 3 few ways we can help you to tap into and explore that infinite self:

1. January 10, 2024: The Rhythm of Life presented by BRT Studio & SpiritWild is a ceremony of intention setting through movement, music and breath at Flash in Washington, DC 
2. January 14, 2024: Amplify your 2024 Identity: A virtual breathwork, somatic practice and vision board exercise on.
3. wtf is mindfulness…and why you might care: A course on the 4 foundations of mindfulness with a modern take on how to keep your wits about you in this attention economy.